A day in the life...

Today was a long day.
I woke up this morning and did a little bit of schoolwork. Then, after getting ready, I headed to the Rep to load the bus for sweet Libby's funeral in Hot Springs. The funeral was in honor of Libby, Catie, and their father. Though it was very, very sad, I thought it was done well. The music and speaking all pointed to Christ and reminded everyone that these three are in heaven with their Savior now. It was hard to see the Cooper family struggling, especially Mrs. Cooper. However, I felt blessed to have brought her a little bit of joy when we sang Oh Happy Day for everyone. We could tell she really loved it.
After getting back from the funeral in Hot Springs, Mom and I met my dad and brother at Corky's for a quick meal. I then went home, picked up my books, and headed straight to tutoring. Fun, fun, I know. Not gonna lie, it was helpful but LONG today.
...And THEN I went to the gym to run. I would have run outside, but it was all snowy and dark outside, so I decided to pass on that. I was supposed to run 4.5 miles for the half marathon training program I'm doing. Usually that's not too hard for me, but today it just drug on and on. Part of it was because I was on the treadmill (my distance watch wouldn't work indoors, so I couldn't use the track.). But it was just...not fun.

So there you have it. My day. Whew. I'm tired.
And I should probably get to bed, considering I'm waking up at 5:15 tomorrow to go to the gym. My life is crazy.

-caylielane

change...

Life is crazy, i tell you.
Changes charge
Into every part of my life.
Creeping in without my consent.
Some good, some bad.
But it's all in His hands.
Yes, I know it will be forever.
But it's strange, you know.
When something you've always known
one way.
changes.
If it weren't for change,
what would life be though?
Would I still be an infant,
ignorant and weak?
quite possibly.
remember, it's His.
plans. changes. will. creation.
I will give thanks,
even when life is too much for me.
change is life, and without it,
we would not truly live.

wonders.

Everyone wonders

It's nature, it's real.

We're people;

We love, we hate,

we feel.

What's still to come?

What have I missed?

So many wonders,

they can't all fit.

We don't know what's certain,

we don't know what's false.

Imagine a life without

He who knows all.

Our wonders will come,

and won't all be solved.

But Someone hears wonders,

He's hearing them all.

Look to the future,

Remember the past.

Life is uncertain. But

heaven will last.

So, I hope I don't need to know what I want to do in college yet. Or where I want to go to college. Because I don't. I can think of a reason why NOT to do any job you throw at me. Why is that? Most people want to do so many things that they can't decide. I could never be a teacher, because I don't have the patience. I could never be a secretary, because I hate desk jobs. I could never be a doctor or nurse because... well, because I would just hate it. I don't know. Maybe I'll just hope I marry a brain surgeon. Or maybe I'll make it big time in acting.
On a personality quiz at school, I was 98% dreamer.
Maybe that's why I can't settle. Sigh. And people always say, "oh, you're sixteen. you have plenty of time to think about it." But I know better. It seemed like yesterday that I was 11 years old, setting up a neighborhood lemonade stand. Why does time have to go by so quickly? It sure does rush me.
I need to leave it up to God, because I'll fail if I try to decide on my own...
If I try to do anything on my own, actually.
-caylielane

My Clarence

Can I make an assumption, here? Everyone has seen It's A Wonderful Life. It's a classic, and everyone knows it. Well, I've been thinking about it, and to be honest, it's kind of got me locked up. You know those days when you are just sad? Sometimes with a legit reason, sometimes for no reason but sadness itself. Those days when you wish you could disappear, and you think that nobody would know the difference? Wouldn't it be great if a Clearance would slip into our lives on those days? And we could go around, observing what would have happened if we had never lived at all. When you think about it, everything we do really does count. It affects someone one way or another when you say something hurtful. A kind word or deed is more than it seems.
The thing is, we can't go back. We can't know how we have affected our loved ones, and those we don't know, to the true depth of the situation.
In conclusion, life is short. Don't let it slip away without making the most of it. Love God. Love others. Love yourself.
-caylielane.

So, today I performed as Mrs. Bradley in The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. I had an awesome time, especially considering that it was my first homeschool production. I'll add pictures soon.
Sure there were little messups, but that's what happens when you've only run the entire thing once before the performance.
Phew.
Well, I had a great time. I think it really was the best Christmas pageant ever!
...and now, I'm totally exhausted and drained. I'm a couple days behind in my schoolwork, my room is a mess, dad's in Nevada... I miss my old friends.
LOVE my new ones, but miss the old ones.
...sigh. i'm just gonna chill. and not do schoolwork.

Why do I always write in lists? Ugh.